The Scotsman

A Scotsman clad in kilt,

 went to a bar, one evening fare.

And one could tell by how he walked,

 he'd drunk more than his share

He stumbled 'round until

 he could no longer keep his feet

Then he fell at once into the grass

 to sleep beside the street



About that time,

 three young and lovely ladies happened by

And one said to the other,

 with a twinkle in her eye

"See yon sleeping Scotsman,

 so strong and handsome-built?

I wonder if it's true

 what they don't wear beneath their kilt?"



So they krept up on that sleeping Scotsman

 quiet as could be

And lifted up his kilt

 about an inch so they could see

And what they found, for them to view,

 beneath that Scottish skirt?

Twas nothing more than God a-graced

 him with upon his birth!



Well they marvelled for a moment,

 then one said

"We must be gone. Let's leave a present for our friend 

 before we move along"

As a gift they left a bright blue ribbon

 tied into a bow

Around the bonny thing

 the Scot's lifted kilt did show



Well, the Scotsman wakes to nature's call,

 and he stumbles for a tree

He lifts up his kilt,

 and gawks at what he sees

And in a startled voice he shouts

 to what's before his eyes

"Och, Lad I don't know where ya been,

 but I see ye won first prize!"